Pinoy Alternate History (Part 2)

Just like last year’s celebration of Independence Day, I joined RocketKapre.com’s Twitter discussion/trend/story telling about alternate Filipino history. By means of the hashtag #RP612fic, Twitter users shared their tweet-length stories about our country’s alternative history and realist micro fiction.

I decided to collate and post my #RP612fic tweets here in my blog because eventually, these stories will be covered with other stories, opinion, and whatnots on my timeline. I would like to preserve these precious tweets and let it reach a wider audience through Juan Republic.

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Ladies and gentlemen, I am presenting you the product of my love for history, pop culture, conspiracy theory, and Game of Thrones.

  • Before Jose Rizal was given a mercy shot in the head, the commanding officer told him “The Lannisters send their regards”.
  • Simoun/Crisostomo Ibarra’s plan to sabotage Edmure Tully and Roslin Frey’s wedding failed when Isagani threw the lamp to the river
  • “Di lang ako Presidente! Artista rin ako at hindi ako basta-basta artista! Ako si Da King at ang orig na Panday!” – President FPJ
  • The White Walkers defeated the Night’s Watch under General Gregorio Del Pilar. They later chased Aguinaldo in Palanan, Isabela.
  •  Andres Bonifacio sensed that something was wrong at the Tejeros Convention when ‘The Rains of Castamere’ was played by the Cavitenos.
  •  The last words of Captain Pedro Janolino to the bloodied corpse of General Antonio Luna: “And now his watch has ended.”
  •   Pol Medina Jr. declared National Artist for Visual Arts – much to the dismay of St. Scholastica administration.
  •  Bossing Vic Sotto unites with Peter Jackson! ‘Si Bilbo Baggins at si Enteng Kabisote’ eyed for the 40th Metro Manila Film Festival
  •   In the Battle of Manila Bay, the Americans implored the help of Tyrion Lannister to use wildfire against the Spaniards.
  •  The City of Manila was declared an ‘Open City’ to save it from further destruction from Khaleesi’s dragons and her unsullied army.
  •  The City of Manila was the second most destroyed city during the War of the Five Kings – next only to Winterfell.
  •  PNoy named Hannibal Lecter as Malacanan’s new executive chef. The palace received good feedbacks from guests at the Vin D’Honneur
  •  Bonifacio rose up from his grave and punched ER Ejercito in the face over the former’s ‘bad image’ in the movie ‘El Presidente’.
  •  Before Aguinaldo’s men could kill them, Procopio and Andres Bonifacio contacted USS Enterprise and shouted “Beam us up, Scotty!”
  •   In 1892, Jose Rizal was exiled to the planet Vulcan. There, he became friends with Spock and the rest of the Vulcans.
  • In the year 2080, due to the numerous archived pro-Marcos posts, kids believe that Ferdinand Marcos is a member of The Beatles.

I could have added other insane stories on my tweets but I didn’t want to flood my followers’ Twitter timeline and I was then in the middle of rushing (read: cramming) my diagnostic examinations for my students (Yes, I’m a High School teacher. Yey.)

It is said that there are no ifs in history. We cannot dwell on the past and try to change it. But we can always learn from its lessons. As what George Santayana said: “Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.”

But we can always use our imagination and think of a good and creative historical fiction. And have a good laugh.

Mabuhay ang Kalayaan! Padayon!

___________________


Elsewhere:

  • Pinoy Alternate History – My #RP612fic tweets from last year – inspired by pop culture, television shows, and conspiracy theories.

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